Why wouldn’t you freeze a muffin forever?
Everyone knows that a hot air balloon eventually pays for itself.
You can’t keep a 200 year-old bottle of balsamic in your dorm, kids.
The tiny sumo wrestler in my heart said “Uh-oh.”
I named the meanest cat after my ballet teacher.
Nothing forges the fires of intense man-on-man bonding like unrepentant capitalism.
Out of nowhere, Tiffany screamed, “DON’T EAT THAT!”