memoir – Elizabeth Barron

Austin Butler (the plant) Will Survive

I named my new plant Austin Butler because I had a feeling it wouldn’t win an Oscar this week either

What I remember doesn’t matter, but it’s been 20 years and my memories are still photo clear, and maybe if

It hurts me to say this as a queer lady, but my Birkenstocks took me down.

Thanks for glitching out in a place where I landed on something soft, brain.

I don’t know what this means, but it has to mean something.

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“In the event of a water landing, you have fifteen seconds to live.”

If I had to attend the Oscars, I would get my outfit at REI.

One lesbian versus 96,000 square feet of Christmas and capitalism – thank goodness we wear comfortable shoes

You’re going to get stuck talking to leaf people.

The only straight thing about me is my bingo card.